Would you wear fashion from the 1700s in 2016? Probably not. A lady’s sense of fashion has come a long way since wearing all that coiffed hair, and those corsets, frames, and hats. Think about how heavy all those layers would feel on a hot summer day and how long it would take to remove all those layers to have sex. Although pretty and feminine, the fashion of that time lacks the comfort and ease we have today.
So let’s say you’re in your 30s and you’re currently having lots of sex or you’re going through treatment in the hopes of having a baby. You’re stressed because you’ve heard that a woman’s fertility drops dramatically at 35. You’re afraid your dreams of having a baby will dramatically fall at the stroke of midnight on your 35th birthday and, at that point, you might have missed the baby boat.
Take a deep breath! It’s going to be okay.
The conventional wisdom that a woman’s fertility plunges at 35 that’s repeated by doctors, fertility specialists, the media, your girlfriends, your family, your neighbor, and in your head– it’s just not true. It’s based on data from France in the 1700s. Imagine that!
Take another deep breath.
You don’t need to wear a 1700-era frock—this limiting baby-making story—in your current daily life. You don’t need to absorb one fiber of this ridiculously old myth into your energy system and dreams.
During Operation Save Uterus, at 40, I sat across a desk from a fertility specialist. She confidently spewed scary and disturbing stats of my chances of getting pregnant if I got my atypical uterine hyperplasia in order. (Will write a separate post about that soon. After the stat exchange she did a full court press to have me see her oncologist colleague.)
It felt extremely frustrating and distressing, to hear my stats decreasing from my 20s to 30s to 40s. I cursed her off in my head and realized she didn’t have a clue about me and my life, so I wasn’t going to take on her statistics.
My annoying exchange with her stayed with me and fuels my desire to shift the story we’ve bought into about our fertility nose-diving at 35. How many women do you know who are having trouble getting pregnant in their 30s and sharing distressing stats they’ve heard from their doctors? That’s a story that shouldn’t be in fashion.
How we wear our beliefs has a significant impact to how our bodies respond.
For the ladies with endometriosis out there (I raise my hand with you), you’ve probably heard from your doctors that endometriosis is associated with infertility. Good news! Recent research points out the infertility risk with endometriosis is approximately half of previous estimates. Half is quite a lot!
Even if you have this painful condition, it doesn’t mean you’re infertile. So don’t put on the infertile sweater as part of your truth or personal style based on outdated information that might not apply to you.
Fertility is as unique as your fingertips. One size doesn’t fit all. It’s time for girlfriends, sisters, moms, grandmothers, and aunts to shift the story and open up positive possibilities, especially for young girls, to how they’ll wear their beliefs about getting pregnant and view the possibilities of choices available in their life.
Medical statistics are just information. How you process information into what you believe about your body, fertility, and what you perceive you can or can’t do is based on how you look at yourself and your life.
If you’re trying to get pregnant and unflattering fertility data is running around in your head:
- Get out of your head—that’s not where babies are created.
- Focus on the positive and available opportunities.
- Remember this quote from Professor Lord Winston that still remains in fashion:
“The best way to have a baby is in bed or by the fireside.”